Hello! I am not sure if anyone even visits this website anymore. Oh well, just for our benefit, I am going to add a recipe in here. We have been busy parents (oh it feels so good to even say that) . Ashwin keeps us busy. Rajesh hardly takes pictures of anything or anybody else other than Ashwin. I can’t think of anything else other than what else I can cook for him, how can I keep him entertained. He walks like a pro and he thinks he talks like a pro.  He says na no no when we touch things he is not supposed to touch. We control our smiles as we try disciplining him. He is a crack up and we have no clue how time flies.

We had a fantastic trip to India. We celebrated Ashwin’s birthday in India and had the opportunity to meet both sides of the families and introduce Ashwin. He enjoyed every little things- noise, people, rides in rickshaws and ordering everyone to switch on the fan even when it was on (he meant, “ I am still warm”)

Speaking of warm, it is still warm in California. So to cool off, we made a beet carrot salad. It is super simple and tastes great. Crunchy and refreshing!

Apple – 1 cup, grated (use pink lady or granny smith)

Beets – 1 cup, grated

Carrot – 1 cup, grated

Vegetable oil – 2 tsp

Ginger – 1 tsp, julienned

Mustard seeds – ¼ tsp

Cumin seeds – ¼ tsp

Lime juice – 1 tsp

Salt & pepper to taste

• Peel and grate apple, beets and carrots in a food processor and place in a large bowl
• Heat oil in a sauté pan; add ginger, mustard and cumin seeds. Sauté for roughly 30 seconds to allow the flavor of ginger infuse in the oil.
• Drizzle over the salad, stir in lime juice, salt, pepper and toss.

Happy Mother’s day to each and every one of you – to mothers and mothers to be. Last year this time, I had lost all hope of ever being a mother and tried to stop obsessing about being a mother and paid tribute to the moms in my life. I felt terrific after the post and maybe just a small spark of hope. Today it is a reality, I am a MOM. I feel like shouting from a roof top that I am a mom too. There are no words to describe how I feel when Ashwin smiles at me when I walk into the room when he wakes up or when I hold him in my arms and repeatedly tell myself,” this is real, he is here and he calls you amma”

This is a very emotional post for me and I might go all over the place, so bear with me here.  There are women who can easily become moms and then folks like us who have tried everything possible, be it the most superstitious of customs to advanced medical help. We become moms by the grace of other moms who have generously allowed us that esteemed position.

Dear Ashwin’s  Birth mom,

I thank you from the bottom of my heart for giving the gift of mother hood. I know you could have chosen an easy route, but you stayed strong and went through the arduous process of finding a perfect home for the little being that kicked you and played somersaults in your belly for 9 months.  We watch him grow and see hints of your personality in him. You welcomed us and my parents in to your home and gave us our first baby shower gifts as you wondered if friends will have time to host a baby shower for us. You let me touch your tummy and then took us to hospital visits to hear our baby’s heart beat.  Life moments that we may never have experienced, we did through you.   You smiled and went through the pain of labor and yet gave us the pleasure to hold him first. You gave Rajesh the opportunity to cut the umbilical cord, which was a surreal moment for him. You waited till we cried and held him before you did and that moment will be etched in my memory for ever. You whispered sweet nothings to him before you left the hospital and I hear you talk to him with your eyes when you visit. The love you have for him can never be expressed in words.  I cry as I write this and relive the moments of Ashwin’s birth. When you tell us how happy you are that he is a happy baby means more to us and than anything.  We enjoy your visits and the ease with which we all hang out is just simply awesome!!! A true sense of peace went through my soul when I lay in the hammock holding Ashwin while you helped Rajesh help us spruce up our backyard. A feeling of gratitude, immense happiness and most importantly peace. Always know we love you and will have nothing but great things to say about you to our lil munchkin.  Thank you  for being you.

Love Shankari

Ashwin is now 7.5 months old and he is growing fast. He has started crawling, standing up and squeals with delight when he sees us after his nap or when R comes home from work.  While everyone is happy for us, they are also concerned about our, “open adoption”. I decided to talk about it a little bit. A few questions we get asked

1.       Do you “have” to keep in touch with Ashwin’s birth family?

Yes, that is a choice we made. In our opinion, Ashwin needs to know where he came from. And it is only healthy that we talk about it openly.

2.       Are you not uncomfortable when they meet Ashwin?

Absolutely not.  We are happy that Ashwin gets to meet them, while he may not understand it now. He will cherish the pictures and memories we have for him. His birth parents have given us a blessing, why should we be uncomfortable?

3.       Is all this good for Ashwin?

We are doing what we think is best for him. Only time will tell, but from the research we have done, we think it is good for him.

4.       So who are his parents? Where are they from?

While we say open adoption, it means open among us – Ashwin, us and his birth parents. We want to respect their privacy.

This was the analogy I gave my friend when I was explaining about open adoption.  When we tell a child, don’t go into that room or don’t touch that- the child only wants to touch or go into that room more than he ever wanted. But if you let the child into the room or touch a particular object, his curiosity is satiated and he will not sneak behind your back to see what is in that room. That is exactly how adoption is. If you want to keep his birth parents info from him, he will wonder why and want to know more. It is his right to know about them, Period!

Every adoption situation is unique and we have been extremely lucky that we are able to have this open relationship.

Now what does all this have to do with Chicken Biriyani? This is what I cooked when Ashwin’s birth father came to visit. It was a success I think. It definitely was on the spicy side. If you are looking for a quick recipe, you should stop reading further on. This is time consuming, but well worth the effort. You know what, make an extra batch and freeze it.

Ingredients

Chicken  thighs – 1 lb ( can be boneless or with bone in) cut into 1-2 inch bite size pieces

To grind

Cilantro – ¼ cup, roughly chopped

Ginger – 1 T, minced

Garlic – 4-5 pods

Yogurt – 1/3 cup

Cloves – 1

Green Cardamom – 4

Green chillies – 4 (Serrano or thai)

Salt to taste

Rice

Basamati rice– 2 cups

Cardamom – 3

Star Anise – 1

Cinnamon – 1 inch stick

Cloves – 3

Saffron – 1 tsp

Milk – ¼ cup ( warm)

Masala

Oil – 3 T + 2 T

Red onions – 2, thinly sliced

Cashew nuts – 2 T

Bay Leaf – 1

Cilantro – 2 T, chopped

Mint – ½ cup

Fennel seeds  1 tsp

Garam Masala – 1 tsp

Tomato paste – 3 T

Salt – to taste

• Grind all the items marked, ‘to grind” to a smooth paste and add it to the chicken. Let it marinate for at least an hour to overnight in the refrigerator. Easy tip : add everything in a zip lock freezer bag, and it’s easy to mix without making a mess
• Heat oil in a sauté pan and cook until the onions are caramelized. Cook it on medium low.
• Add rest of the ingredients and sauté for a minute or two on medium low and set aside.
• While the onions are cooking, cook the rice
• Heat a large pot with water and when the water comes to a boil add whole spices and rice. Cook until the rice is done. ( cook rice like you cook pasta)
• Drain all water and set the rice aside with the whole spices.
• Heat 2 T of oil in a Dutch oven or a heavy bottomed pan with a lid
• Sauté the marinated chicken until it is almost done. Transfer the chicken to a plate, leaving a little bit on the bottom
• Add a layer of cooked rice and over it the onion mixture, repeat until all the chicken, onion and mixture and rice is over.
• Add saffron to the warm and slowly drizzle that over the rice
• Cover the pan with a moist towel and then cover with a lid and cook on very low heat for 20 minutes
• Serve warm with raitha

Hi Everyone, We are sorry that this blog has not been updated in a while. We have been cooking; we think of blogging and taking pictures and over time forget the actual recipe ( can you believe that Rajesh has not downloaded images from his camera in over 5 weeks, in-spite of the gentle nag for this soup pic).  This recipe turned out great and I had no trouble recalling it, because we loved it and want to make this more often.   We don’t like to eat the same dish all week. We begin craving for variety and may end up indulging in “comfort food” (read deep fried, potato, junk food etc). If we cook something different for lunch every day, then we do pretty well. With Ashwin in our midst, we want to begin eat healthy, so we live to see him go to college and be grandparents maybe. And if we eat healthy, hopefully the lil one will emulate us. But he will not be deprived of mac & cheese or an occasional deep fried vada.  When we grew up (gosh, it seems like that was decades ago) we played out a lot, walked and ran around like there was no tomorrow, climbed trees and things I don’t want to talk about for fear that Ashwin will read this years later and say, “but mom, you did that”.  But kids these days don’t want to go out to play and if they start leading such sedentary lives, then I think it is justified in watching what we feed. I hope Ashwin grows up to love playing outdoors than being cooped up in the house playing a video game.

Coming back to the recipe, I used to a slow cooker to make this soup and we used it also as a filling in our tortilla wrap. I am told that you can make this in your pressure cooker (no oil needed here either),  after you soak beans overnight. We had some frozen chicken that was marinated with salt, cayenne and lemon juice. So we used that in this soup.

Chicken breast – 2 cups, cubed (we used frozen)

Ginger – 1 tsp, grated

Garlic – 1 tsp, minced

Black beans – ½ cup

Tomato paste – 1 T

Chicken Stock – 8 cups ( approx)

Cayenne – ½ tsp

Salt – to taste

Cilantro- 1 T, for garnish (optional)

Lime juice – 1 tsp

Roast & powder

Coriander seeds – ½ tsp

Cumin seeds – 1 T

Whole Black pepper – 1 T

• Place all the ingredients in the slow cooker.
• Dry roast the spices in a sauté pan and grind it to a fine powder using a mortar & pestle or spice grinder. (Refrain from using spice powders from a bottle).
• Cook it on low for roughly six hours. Check for seasonings and adjust to your taste.
• Garnish with cilantro and a dash of lime juice.

The next day, when the liquid was all absorbed, we rolled it in a tortilla with spring greens. Add some tortilla chips for a crunch if you like along with slices of avocado. It was delicious. Vegetarians can make this soup with vegetables of the season.  I used the same spice mix to make another dish. That recipe coming soon, really

Wish you all a Very Happy New Year! 2010 ended off on a fabulous note for us and we know 2011 will bring more joy and happiness. Do you make New Year resolutions? I personally don’t. The goal is maintain a healthy life style. We have slowly moved from white rice to brown rice. The only days we eat white rice is when we go out or when we have guests over.
We are certainly cooking at home, but tend to make quick one pot dishes and just don’t have the time to take pictures to blog about it. I write a story in my mind, but it never ends up being typed. Ashwin keeps us on our toes. While he is not a fussy or demanding baby, work has quadrupled at home. Cooking takes a back seat and laundry (sigh) is the winner at home. In between laundry, feeding and changing diapers, we cook.
Last night’s meal was an Italian flavored soup. Simple ingredients, hardly takes any time at all and yet filling and healthy. I wanted to cook with ingredients we had at home. So here goes the recipe. Please feel free to use one tomato instead of paste and fresh herbs if you have them available. I used frozen parsley from Daregal and dried thyme.

Olive Oil – 1 T
Garlic – 3 cloves, finely minced
Red Onion – 1 cup, medium diced
Bell Pepper – 1, medium dice
Carrots – 3, small or 1 large, medium dice or rounds
Tomato Paste – 2 T
Sun dried tomatoes packed in oil – 2 T, finely chopped
Thyme (dried) – ½ tsp
Rosemary – 1 tsp, finely chopped
Vegetable stock – 4 cups
Cannellini beans – 1 can, rinsed
Parsley – ¼ cup, chopped
Salt to taste

• Heat oil in a Dutch oven and when the oil is hot, add garlic and saute until it turns slightly golden in color.
• Stir in the onions and cook until they turn translucent.
• Add bell pepper, carrots, tomato paste and sun dried tomato and sauté well, so that the tomato paste gets well incorporated.
• Add the herbs, give it a quick sauté and pour vegetable stock in to the pot along with the beans.
• Season with salt and allow the soup to simmer on medium low for 15-20 minutes.
• Garnish with parsley and serve warm

This soup is by no means an Italian soup. I used herbs that are used commonly in Italian cooking, that is all.

This evening, my eyes fell on the shrink wrapped pineapple from last week, which has been imploring to get used.
Since its been sitting in the fridge for a few days, it wasn’t as sweet, and I sliced it into slabs and threw it in a flat pan on medium heat to concentrate the sugars. Come dinner time, Shankari who has been having a bad day with her bad back wanted some rice and yogurt ( I think she wanted to keep it simple for me, as I have been having a busy day at work)

Shankari got her rice, but that plain rice did not seem as appealing to me, gosh my folks would be surprised at how my tastes have changed or as they say in Tamil, his tongue has gotten too long. And all these pineapple chunks were calling me Shankari tasted it, and liked it so much that she wanted a plateful which polished off without problem.

Pineapple : 2 cups chopped into 1 inch cubes
Steamed rice – 2 cups ( We use left over rice, and this recipe worked equally well with jasmine and basmati rice)
Cardamom – 4 whole pods
Butter – 2 tsp
cayenne – 1/2 tsp
garam masala – 1/2 tsp
Salt to taste

Heat butter in a pan, and add cardamom pods in it.
Saute for a minute, and add the steamed rice.
To this add cayenne, garam masala, and salt to taste.
Grill the pineapple on a flat pan, on medium heat until it slightly browns. Add pineapple to rice and cook for 2-3 minutes.
Check for seasonings and serve warm.

This post has been in my drafts for the past 5 weeks, and I have made this dish 3 times by popular demand and finally got the pictures after we made this dish again today.

Its not everyday that I get an inspiration to cook, but with the little one keeping Shankari quite occupied I was inspired to get some food on the table. Rotisserie chicken did not appeal to me that day.

Some days I cook from my heart, and dont go to any recipe book, and this is one such dish. This recipe shaped up in my mind as I cleaned and cut the chicken.

Chop 1lb chicken breast into 1/2 inch cubes, wash/drain and sprinkle 1/2 tsp turmeric. Turmeric is an antiseptic, as well has having medicinal cancer fighting properties so I add a dash of turmeric to almost everything I cook. Massage the turmeric in the chicken and let it sit.
Heat some butter in a large pan (with a tight heavy lid) or pressure cooker, and add 1 large onion chopped, 1/2 inch stick of cinnamon, 3-4 star anise flowers. 5-6 cloves, 1/2 tsp pepper. Roast everything until the onions are golden brown.
Grind the above mixture along with 3 tbsp frozen peas, and 4 dried red chillies to a fine paste. Peas was a last minute inspiration, and it gives a nice smooth texture to the gravy.
Add the paste to utensil used to fry the onions. Add salt to taste. I used a little water to help clean out the masala from the grinder jar (less than 1/4 cup water)

Pressure cook for one whistle on the pressure cooker, or cook for about 5 minutes on high if you are using the heavy bottomed pan covered with a proper fitting lid, or you wont be left with much gravy)

Serve with cumin rice or peas pulav, or rotis. We both thought this was good enough to be shared.

After the arrival of the little one, cooking has taken a back seat. I am sure I can make some time to cook, but I rather gaze at him and wait for him to chuckle in his sleep or just stare into my eyes.  I have probably cooked three to four times in the last one month. We had good friends give us some food to last for a week or two and prior to that my parents were hereJ

I kept going back to look at Manisha Kadipatta chicken. I love the flavor of curry leaves in chicken and her recipe was my inspiration, but wanted to make something quick and easy. If your chicken breasts are frozen, it actually helps to slice the chicken thinly. Or to make it easier, buy some shredded chicken. And note, this is a curry not with curry powder, but using curry leaves as the star of the dish.

Oil – 1 T

Onion – 1, large, thinly sliced

Curry leaves – 1 cup, packed and chopped finely

Garlic – 8 pods, sliced thin

Cayenne – 1 tsp

Freshly crushed Pepper -1/2 tsp

Chicken – 1 lb, sliced thinly

Salt to taste

• Heat oil in a sauté pan and add the onions and curry leaves. Allow it cook nice and slow on medium low until the onions are caramelized
• Sprinkle a little bit of salt over the onions if you want to cook them fast.
• Stir in the garlic, cayenne and freshly crushed   pepper and cook for roughly 2-3 minutes.
• Add chicken and stir well, so that the spices get well incorporated with the chicken.
• Season with salt and cook until the chicken is done.
• Serve with roti.

Where should we start? When rice was showered on us while we were tying the knot and blessed to bring grand children to our parent’s lives? Or when I was about 12 years old and read a story on adoption and the only thing I wanted to do when I grow up was to adopt? We become mommies to our little cousins at our 3 day weddings when aunts would happily hand over the little ones to us the younger cousins who loved playing house house.

Questions started popping here and there about when we plan on having a child. While we can plan our lives, things take its own sweet time and the journey to parenthood taught us lessons that we may have never learned if the journey was a smooth one, for that we are grateful. It made us stronger a couple, and to respond as a team when inquisitive minds wanted answers. We realized that the only thing important to us was to be parents and it did not matter if it was biological or adopted. When we thought of adoption, just like anybody out there, we had various misconceptions that scared us away from it until we met our dear friend Ann. How we found Ann is a whole different story. Ann explained to us the whole concept on open adoption. A lot of our friends encouraged us to go to India, but our minds were set on adopting locally. Just the thought of a mother going through pregnancy  and planning on placing her child in a good home, means she cares, and is making a selfless decision in the best interest of her baby vs  a baby being left in the door steps of an orphanage.

We researched on various agencies, read more about open adoption and finally chose one agency. The paperwork takes a while, but the desire to be parents makes all that a piece of cake. The one challenge is to write a letter to prospective birth mom’s who will read our letter to know more about whom we are and our family. How do you toot your own horns on what great parents we will be and talk about lives, our family in 3-4 pages in addition to pictures of us with friends and family ?We were told that that they had consultants to do that as well. Really? Once the letter is done, finger printing and the whole nine yards , we are then in the “officially waiting stage”. This is the most trying time in our opinion. Everyone with the best of intention asks if we heard anything or how long it will take and we have no answers but to educate our friends and family the process. A birth mother when pregnant may either call our agency or read our letter on the agency website and then make a choice. She has the choice to contact myriads of agencies, read profiles before she makes up her mind- it is a family for life that she is choosing for her baby.  So while we wait, we begin to wonder if our letter is done well, why does no one like us and so on & so forth. The key at these times is for one of us to help the other snap out of it. It is very trying, and this is the time for one to start looking for ways to keep you occupied.  You do not want to shy away from asking friends and family for support.

When we got the call, we were filled with joy, hoping we will be the chosen one. We watched Ashwin being born and started feeding him, changing diapers and caring for him right away. The entire wait was so worth it. We found a beautiful family and a wonderful selfless mother & father who helped us begin our journey. Our family is complete, our life dream is fulfilled and we will now work on making Ashwin’s dreams come true. To all of you who showered us with positive thoughts during trying times, to those who emailed/called and sent care packages when we felt low, our heartfelt Thanks. Families’ being there for us is expected, but the love we have received from the blog world cannot be expressed.  Our next post is about the lovely baby shower to welcome Ashwin into our lives.

This is a family recipe with a fun name attached to it. The chutney is served typically with dosas and idlis and mind you it is made so hot that you want to shout out expletives after your first morsel, but it is so addicting that you continue to enjoy it even after you know it is that spicy. It is traditionally made with raw shallots, red chillies, tamarind and salt- as simple as that. The raw onions gives it one degree of hot, add to it some red chillies which takes it to a whole new level. I think amma makes it almost once or twice a week back home.  Amma makes it two ways, one is the way I just described and the other is after grinding to saute in oil, so that it stays longer and tones down the heat a wee bit.

Now to the name of the recipe- sandhaza- according to my dad they called it that because it was the chutney from hell, you get the drift? The after effects of eating something that hot? ). Anyways, we only know it by that name and Rajesh has been enjoying this hot chutney with dosa and even spread on a piece of toast.

Shallots – 1.5 cups, chopped

Garlic – 3 pods

Tamarind paste – 1 tsp

Dried red chillies – 5-6 ***

Salt to taste

For seasoning

Oil – 1 T

Mustard seeds – ½ tsp

Curry leaves – 5 to 6 (optional)

• Grind shallots, red chillies, tamarind, salt and garlic to a coarse paste, adding as little water as you can.
• Heat oil in a saute pan and fry the ingredients listed under seasoning ( roughly 30 seconds), add the chutney and cook on medium low for roughly 5-8 minutes.

Like I said earlier, you can have this uncooked, the traditional way. In that case, drizzle the seasoning over the chutney and it is ready.Store this chutney in the refrigerator and it will last for a week. My favorite way of having this chutney is to  butter the bread, and spread this spicy goodness and toast it on on iron skillet. Have this with a cuppa Indian tea- BLISS!!!